Authenticity in 2021

In my last updated post, I shared an excerpt from the first draft of my book - and I was actually in labor at home when I posted it! (I'll share more on that in a future post.) Along the same theme of my book, I'm curious to explore with you authenticity in identity.

Like so many others, I made grand plans for 2020 with God and with my husband. Most of the "grand" involved travel. Did they happen? In January, we competed in Hawaii and became the first "6-dance" Champions. In February, repeat in Texas. In March, we planned to go to New Orleans for a larger competition, but then, enter Pandemic. Even though our plans changed and despite worldwide chaos and communal transitions, other [greater] plans happened. We had a baby!!!

No one can predict what achievements or failures will take place this year, but every new year, as well as every new day, I set an intention that I try to live by. Leaning into 2021- though it's already the start of its second month- we continue to make plans, dream and surrender. After the birth of our first born son in November, I reflected and decided that my main theme for the year of 2021 is connection. 

How is connection related to identity?

My hope for connection this year is rooted in family, specifically in redefining family. What does it mean for me to grow as a wife and now as a mother of one? How will I invest as a first time aunt to my nephew and sister to another new mom- along with reconnecting with other siblings and extended family in a new and deeper way? (It's amazing how children draw families together!) How do I involve my parents and grandmother, newly grandparents and great-grandma, when they are in a different time zone and cannot travel because of the ongoing pandemic?

How we relate to family is a major key in understanding our value, purpose and worth. My heart is to always be authentic. But in family, I've realized, that sometimes I'm not. Sometimes I hide who I really am. And as I reflect upon this, I ask myself: aren't family the people with whom we are called to truly share our authentic selves? Aren't they the people who will love us always, despite our flaws and failures? Is this true in my experience of family? Do I love my family in this way?

When Jesus was teaching a crowd of people, his mother and brothers tried to press through and talk to him. The [disciples] told Him, "Your mother and brothers need you..." His reply was: Who are my mother and my brothers? Those who do the will of my Father in Heaven... (Matthew 12:46-50)

When I first read this and considered it - for many years- I received it as an easy out to avoid my family dynamics, including all conflicts and differences of opinions. As I read it now, I see something new. God, in His kindness and acceptance, would never condone this type of attitude and heart posture! In the character of Love, could He be saying something different, something deeper?

In Luke chapter 8, Jesus says: "So pay attention to your hearts as you hear my teaching, for to those who have open hearts, even more revelation will be given to them until it overflows. And for those who do not listen with open hearts, what little light they imagine to have will be taken away." (Luke 8:18) When I read this now, my heart cries out to God: I want to have an open heart! I want revelation to overflow from me!

Now, I understand the context of the story above in a new way. In the Passion translation, it's titled Jesus' True Family:

Mary, Jesus' mother, and her other sons came to where Jesus was teaching, but they couldn't get through the crowd that had gathered around him. So he was told, "Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak with you.

Jesus told them, "These who come to listen to me are like my mothers and my brothers. They're the ones who long to hear and to put God's word into practice."

(Luke 8:19-21)

Jesus wasn't saying that his mother and his brothers were to be ignored- and especially that we could call "in the name of religion" ignoring our blood relatives acceptable! Rather, He was expanding the family of God. It's not just the Jewish people who were invited to be chosen. Through Jesus, God's Son, He was opening up the people of God to include outsiders. He wasn't saying "Don't be Jewish" to the Jews. He was simply making a way for non-Jews to also be called Children of Abraham, Children of God. He wasn't at all saying that his mother and brothers weren't his family anymore! When we know our place in God's family, our identity is solidified. He values us. He gives us purpose. He calls us worthy. 

I ask myself: How can I learn from Jesus' connections with His blood-family and His created family. Through faith, we have all become family with the Anointed One, calling out to God as Abba, Father. How can we embrace the family of faith? 

Authenticity is:

- noun - the quality of being authentic, genuine, legitimate.
Authentic - adjective - of undisputed origin

According to Google, people who are authentic "know who [they] are... love and accept who [they] are... genuinely express themselves, and don't strive for perfection". When I'm not living authentically, I've noticed that it's harder for me to stay present. 

Here are some examples from my life:
I've had my "Dance family". The problem: these were sometimes shallow relationships built on one commonality. When we stopped dancing together in the same studio, the "family" breaks apart. Later I realized these were more friendships and acquaintances, but not family. Have you encountered this in some form of a hobby, group or season of life you've been in?

Perhaps more of you can relate to having a "Work family". This is becoming a major problem in the US specifically as it relates to overworking and burnout. The problem is that a mask of professionalism hides who we truly are. We share common curtesy to encourage each others' goals while climbing a career ladder; however, when careers shift, layoffs or promotions happen, or we work in separate departments, we realize that these, too, were superficial. I now also wonder for many people's new context of "working from home" how this shifts the "work family" concept even more. 

Then there's "Faith family" and "Church family" - Can we not be a family of "inter faith"?" And what about those who aren't "gentile" in the Church??

These are concepts I'm exploring more as I work on a first draft of my book, exploring identity as it gets mixed in with religion. As a Jewish person who seemed to have to leave my religion in order to meet God- through Christianity- I wonder how many other people feel like they have to change or conform to the standards that the Church has put upon what it means to "be" a Christian. Others call themselves Christian, but are they really living in the love and identity as a Child of God? Since my undisputed origin (authenticity) is in Judaism, after over a decade of attending churches, defining my religion as Christian, and also doing Christian missions to share the message of "Christianity" (the message of Jesus) with others- I'm only now beginning to wonder about my authenticity. The bottom line that I'm unpacking is:

Yeshua, the Jewish Messiah, has redeemed me!

As I heal from wounds just like many others, I hope to share my story for the purpose of encouraging others. It's by the Blood of the [Passover] Lamb AND by the WORD of our testimonies that we OVERCOME! If you need to overcome in your life, in any aspect of identity, I hope you'll join me further as I explore living authentically and sharing my stories with you this year! 

Here are some questions I hope you'll consider:

* For those of you in the church: who do you consider to be Jesus' family? Are they only disciples? What about His Jewish [biological] mother and brothers?

* For those who are Jews: do you feel you have "universal family" with other Jews? 

* For all of us: how do we decide who we define as family?

And if you've read all the way to here... thank you! I hope it inspired or encouraged you, stirred something in you, or helped you in some way. Please share your thoughts, answers to questions posed, insights or revelations in the comments below. I'd love to hear from you!